This is from the meeting of Thursday 19 March 1986, at Newport. The exercise for the month was something like to take one definite half hour period each day, chosen the night beforehand, and to make a concentrated effort to remember myself during that period.
Daniel said that he had been sitting in his office, feeling exhausted. He didn’t want to let it take over, and realised that it might have something to do with the many incomplete tasks on hand. So he completed one of them and his state changed, there came a feeling of relief.
“Was this finishing the undone task performed during the half hour period?
“Yes.”
“What was the nature of the relief?” There was a pause. “Wouldn’t it be nice to be able to remember? Was everything clearer, a little simpler? Was it relief from worry and confusion?”
“It was like a pause in the middle of a storm.”
“I need to learn to remember the taste of those states, the state before, the state while I was making the effort, and the state afterwards. Otherwise, what basis do I have for understanding and profiting from my experience? When my state changes, so do my memories, but I need to be able to retain some memory while I am in the better state, otherwise, there is no connection between the higher and the lower states.”
“Was it a sensation, or was it a perfume, or was it a feeling of force? I need to be able to use forms, I need to be able to use words. What do I associate with this improved condition? Was it a rhythm?”
Daniel was not sure, but he did have a sort of feeling that his state was better.
“Then there was a feeling of life in you. You have to try and understand what you receive, because when I am like that, I want to be able to change.”
I understood Mr Adie to mean that to the extent I receive, I will understand. To receive something in more than one centre is to receive more, and this will necessarily bring with it more understanding, because understanding is a function of the common consciousness of centres. So perhaps the effort to understand brings what has been received from one centre to another.
“I don’t want to be like that, I want to be mobile,” continued Adie. “Otherwise, I can become tense even in trying to remember. I ask you what has happened, and you become tense. I need to understand the forms of my knowledge.”
“I want knowledge of myself. All sorts of things are going on, all sorts of sensations, feelings, memories. And what form is my recollection in? In what form? I don’t want to settle for an easy answer with words, but is it in a form of colour and light? Or is it a form of feeling of force or mobility? I need to know. By this means I can perhaps find my way back. And if I see my state is not like that, then I see that it is not wanted.”
“I knew that there was tension there, but I could not find any words,” said Daniel.
“You don’t need to find words, exactly, you need to find some of these indicators. But if you find them, then words will come, words of different forms. You see, there is sight, hearing, touch, taste, smell. These are forms of perception and appreciation. But there are other forms of inner cognition available to us. We don’t think about them very much, and tend not to unless we are trying seriously to work. Then they begin to have value.”
“Our work is on our own. We are on our own in the work, and therefore we need to have our own inner formation, our own inner language. I want to have my own inner means of cognition, of inner consciousness, of what is taking place. It is towards the knowledge of the higher mind. Our ordinary knowledge is so much cruder. Our words.”
“This explains the function of the poet. The true poet. He uses words, but he uses words in a rhythm, he uses the word to imply shock, to paint pictures of colour and light. He includes all different elements of sadness, sorrow, seriousness and lightness, through words. The painters with colour, the sculptors with form.”
“Now, don’t be satisfied with relief. Accept it, but seek more. You want to understand yourself.”
Joseph Azize, 17 April 2017
