The questions show how much people could gain. These are real experiences. One of the benefits of having teachers like the Adies was that they could help you discern what was true in your experience from what was fantasy, wishful thinking, and projection.
Olga: I’ve had a realisation in a circumstance where it was required that I fit in and tread gently, and pick up an unfinished job where somebody else left off, but would know what I did. It suddenly struck me, what my normal impulse and longing is, and that is to just sweep everything from the table that anybody may have done, to say that this is all nonsense and start fresh. That is the attitude I’ve shown on different occasions here over the years. It has never really been so clear to me; it’s quite completely new to me, how something in me intends to bring something, help, and sort of just smash everything and say, now we’re doing it properly and then run over everything and everybody. I’m glad that that came clear to me, because it hasn’t really been so obvious.
Mr Adie: It was essential, it was essential to have that understanding so as to do what is required, and to do it in such a way that there is no unnecessary future unpleasantness resulting. It will be what we call, “a dripping roast,” it takes a lot time to cook but then a lot of people can get a good meal from it for a long time.
Olga: There are certain times when I have to do certain things, but then there are long times where it’s up to me when I do what. It puts me again in a confusion …
Mr Adie: That you could use differently. This is what you need, otherwise you’ll be in a dream. You’re in a challenge all the time there. You have to be there, and let all these ripples go on. And to do that, you are observing everything, you are not being pulled by everything. You are really observing and also remembering yourself. Which is a different kind of life altogether, you still suffer, you suffer much more, but quite differently. You now suffer for profit. You begin to repair the past, you find out things, which now you’re entitled to find out. But you’re not entitled to find out without that different approach.
This explains why Christ taught in parables. He said, “I speak in parables, lest they should hear.” “They” were the Pharisees and Sadducees, lest they should hear, and hearing they should understand. They were not entitled to understand. Because it would have given them a power that they couldn’t use. We try and speak more directly; we come to our presence so as to be able to hear and to understand and to use responsibly. We’re really in the presence of what’s going on.
Olga: There was something else that happened, I saw something which a few years ago that would off send me into a fury of jealously and angry. I was watching if that would occur. And it didn’t, it was just empty, as if it had run …
Mr Adie: That’s quite run its course then. It’s made its race. Now the question is, has it got any cousins or aunts or sisters, or is it going to occur again? I start to live, for a moment I live and know it, there’s strength in that.
I need to take the essence and give thanks for, acknowledge, and then I can use for being. If I really use it for being then certainly what I have to relate to outside would be better, no doubt. I should be freer, less distorted, less partial.
Mervyn: When I went away about three and half weeks ago, I took with me two things. At one of the meetings before I left it was given, this idea of taking three or four hours in a day and setting it aside for work, for oneself. And it struck me at the time, it seemed very practical, I’ve never been that practical before. I also took with me a resolve to not interfere with the relationship of my wife and her best friend, who was away with us on the trip. Many things have come of this, I’ve become clear on a lot of different things more than I can probably get through tonight. One think that did strike me was the difference between what my personality wants and what I want, two entirely different things – and mostly it wins.
Mr Adie: What you say, is a picture of work. It’s something very difficult. I take my hands out of drawers that don’t concern me, they couldn’t concern me.
Mervyn: It’s very difficult to give it up.
Mr Adie: It’s very difficult but it’s marvellous to do it. I mean, take this question of relationship that you refer to. Here is something that you cannot know, that can’t concern you, that know nothing and yet, and yet, you want to have something to do with it. It’s difficult to let it go, but to do it, is quite free. There’s a lot of strength there, real strength. In that connection, there’s a few words of Blake: “He who bends to himself a joy, does the winged life destroy, but he who kisses the joy as it flies, lives in eternity sunrise.” That’s pretty deep. Like that I can share in life.
Mervyn: Yes, normally I’m very possessive, very much wanting to hold on to things which of course things I cannot hold onto.
Mr Adie: Yes, well, you’re on a path there, a definite path, an enormous aspect of work. There will be more and more, and you’ll get more and more strength from it. This is freedom, this is the part that wants freedom, with that, I can go freely.
